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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 09-17-2007, 04:03 PM
Asuki-san Asuki-san is offline
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Couple of other poems

Since I got really great responds, even if they were off topic, I decided to keep writing poems. [Thanks to the people whom posted!]

A promise is a promise.

As some may say, the moon never rises,
The earth just spins, making it seem like the moon rises,
I don't believe them,
You said you would love me until the moon stopped rising,
Has it stopped rising?
No.....
That just means you are jealous liar,
You saw her and just....... left,
To many times have you walked past me and felt nothing,
When you took me to the most romantic place I could think of,
You broke my heart, and not just that,
You broke the most precious thing in the whole entire world,
A promise.........


Blood rose

I sit here in the dark, staring at this......... gift,
It is tied with a red bow,
Single, like me after this afternoon,
12:00, noon, high sun, liar's sin,
The gift sits high, looking not a day old,
Me? I am more than 5,110 days old,
To old for this beautiful gift, yet to young,
To old for this same game,
To young for a lying heart-break,
I try to get away, but I just can't,
You seem to be everywhere,
And I know why,
This gift in front of me, the same colour,
The same colour......... of my broken heart.........
The blood rose........
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Old 09-17-2007, 04:21 PM
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PowerGirl PowerGirl is online now
Is PINK?
 
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I really like these! More complex than your first poem. In a good way of course.
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Old 11-12-2007, 01:13 PM
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lilytheyellowluver lilytheyellowluver is online now
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wow..... that is really.... thats just...... wow........ you have amazing talent!
i almost cried!!! exellent!!!!!!!
OMG you shouldn't be wasting this amazing talent on the internet!!! show some to like the mayor or to an author at a book signing........ i dont know just get noticed you deserve to be in the spotlight!!
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Old 11-19-2007, 05:56 PM
blossomgirl101 blossomgirl101 is offline
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Great job, they are amazing poems. Deep, really poetic, and just well, deep! *claps*

Note: Sorry for the bump...I just had to say it though, its great!

Last edited by blossomgirl101; 11-19-2007 at 06:00 PM. Reason: I didn't realize the date
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Old 11-23-2007, 10:06 AM
monkifunk monkifunk is offline
Um... that's... not mine.
 
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