*Press the customer service things around the store then quickly run away.

*Stand next to the greeters and scream, "GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN!"

*Apply for a job, then when they accept you call the police saying that Wal-Mart is hiring minors that don't have work permits.

*Insist to new workers that *they* pay *you*.

*Throw paper airplanes at the security cameras, with sound effects of course.

*Shoplift the paper that says, "We do not tolerate shop lifters".

*Give the cashier a *break* then let anyone who's buying stuff take it for free.

*Open a bunch of bags and boxes, spill them all over and leave them there. Run. Fast.

*Spill all the juices on the floor and then press the customer service button. When the worker comes and falls, say, "Laying down on the job are we?" and get the manager.

*Spill all the juices on the floor THEN invite all the workers for a Slip-And-Slide party.

*Hide in the toy bin and wait for someone to come and pop out screaming, "ALWAYS LOW PRICES AT WAL-MART!"

*Do dances in front of the security cameras.

*When getting a book, bring your library card to the check-out.

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Happy Christmas/Hannukah/Kwanzaa!

"The last time I was this scared, I had to actually fight a Dark Lord in order to make the world safe for wizards." - Radar, "Paper Towns" by John Green